Never Saw It Coming one act play script

ONE ACT PLAYS

NEVER SAW IT COMING
A powerful exploration by Les Clarke of relationships in the ‘eternal triangle’ situation. A fast-moving drama for one man and two women.

Plot Summary
Susie is having an affair with Brian and is cooking him his favourite meal. Brian arrives at her flat but explains that he can’t stay. This leads to a heated argument and Brian walks out. Later on, the doorbell rings and she rushes to the door thinking it’s Brian. It turns out to be Brian’s wife Steph, looking for her husband, and she barges in! The two women, initially hostile, come to relate to each other’s position. Realising the truth, they plan a little surprise for Brian!
ISBN 1 904930 56 5

CAST ONE MALE TWO FEMALE

SUSIE, young, attractive and spirited
BRIAN,tall, arrogant and full of himself STEPH, Brian's wife, confident

SET
Susie's front room

TIME - present day
DURATION - approx. 40 minutes

Script Sample - Eternal triangle

Susie is trying to persuade Brian to leave his wife Steph

Susie Keep your promise. Leave her and be with me! I’ll make you happier than you ever believed possible! You say you love me, prove it to me! Be with me! Be with me!

She throws her arms around him and he struggles and breaks free

Brian I can’t! Not yet! You can’t just do it at the drop of a hat, you know, it takes a lot of planning!
Susie You’ve had two bloody years to plan it! Just throw some clothes in a suitcase, grab your toothbrush and get your arse over here, how difficult’s that!
Brian (sarcastically) Oh yeah, right. And how about the house for starters, eh? What happens to my house, then?

He slumps down in the r/hand chair

Susie Sell it, you’ll be living here with me, you don’t need another house!
Brian She won’t just let me sell it, she loves that house! She won’t move and she won’t give it up, I’m telling you now!
Susie (sits in the other chair) Then she’ll have to buy you out and give you your half, won’t she, that’s the law.
Brian Oh you make it sound so simple, don’t you? Where’s she going to get that sort of money to pay me half? That house is worth over seven hundred thousand.
Susie She works. She’ll have to take out a loan.
Brian Oh get real, will you, for God’s sake! She could never afford to do that …
Susie (cutting in) And I can’t afford to wait! If you love me keep your promise, leave her and be with me!
Brian I can’t, not yet.
Susie Then when? Tuesday? Next week? In another two years time? In the year bloody dot? When, Brian, when?
Brian (angrily) Maybe never if you keep on like this! Look, I don’t need all this grief! I get enough bloody grief at home, thank-you-very-much. I don’t need it from you!
Susie (measured) Oh I see. Right. (She stands and starts to pace about in front of him) I’m supposed to be the quiet little submissive woman who’s there for your pleasure and amusement, am I? (She curtseys grandly) The subservient mistress who’s always on hand the minute you snap your fingers! But woe-betide-me the minute I put a foot out of place because you don’t want to know. Well not any more, this worm has turned. I’m changing the ground rules from now on. You want me in future? Then you take me out. You wine and dine and romance me and if I’m satisfied with your efforts, I may, and it’s only may at the moment, let you into my bed at the end of the evening. (She leans towards him, sarcastically) So how does that sound to you? Mmm?

from Never Saw It Coming

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